Its The...Ben Fan Happiness Bang!

THE TIME IS NOW! CHRISTMAS SPECIAL AHOY!

The Ben Baker Dirty Video Cassette

Series Two, Episode Five -

“The Ben Baker Dirty VT Christmas Tape” [14’35, 80kb]

Download it here!

Part two of a two part story in seventeen parts. BEN BAKER, the crofter’s daughter is penniless and destitute having had his land cruelly snatched away in a rigged game of “Bum Derby” run by the mentally unhinged BARON JOHN BARROWMAN, who has taken his beloved pony, TERRY THOUGHTFUL and made him do a right load of mucky stuff and that like and stuff and eceteras.

Can love win the day and triumph over christmas adversity? A bit. Now download it already…

When Will Ben Stop Crying?

Just a note to say the christmas special is written, recorded and edited together and ready to go up. But Virgin Media’s horrible internet is playing up again so Ill have to upload it over at my parents house later today. Apologies for the delay. And hope you’re having a lovely christmas…

 Oh, and just so you know. The special is fucking BRILLIANT…

Its Listmas! DAY FIVE

One more list before the christmas break (I’ll be covering films sometime after Boxing Day) and Ive made it a quickie because I know in reality, few people are actually reading this right now.

Radio
1. Get This
2. The Arts And How They Was Done
3. Down The Line
4. Count Arthur Strong’s Radio Show
5. I’m Sorry I Havent a Clue

And as for a link, dont forget that the extremely festive Talk About The Christmas Singles is still online and my favourite possibly of the run (they are all my tiny passion children though) so why not download it here?

But for those who think thats a cop out, come back tomorrow at 3 and prepare for A Very Dirty Video Cassette Christmas, not to mention a genuine VERY BIG SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT from yours truly. Thats assuming anyone is still out there…

…Hello?

Its Listmas! DAY FOUR

And now more of those pesky pop songs that made 2007 so…um, “2007-y”. Enjoy!

10. Bloc Party - “The Prayer”
9. The New Pornographers - “My Rights Versus Yours”
8. Those Dancing Days - “Those Dancing Days EP”
7. Jarvis - “Dont Let Him Waste Your Time”
6. Justice - “D.A.N.C.E”
5. Superchunk - “Misfits And Mistakes”
4. Modest Mouse - “Dashboard”
3. Super Furry Animals - “Run-Away”
2. Los Campesinos! -  “You Throw Parties We Throw Knives”

and at the top spot for 2007, iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiits….

 1. Kate Nash - “Mouthwash”

Yes, the gorgeous button-nosed not even vaguely Lily Allen-type won my heart from the first “uh oh on a friday night” and its not been shakeable since. Slagged off by desperate wankers who havent bothered to actually listen to her properly, this single is the highpoint of a very enjoyable and promising LP. As for the single, think Elton John plus The Scissor Sisters divided by Feist and multiplied by a hundredweight box of fire-damaged Alicia’s Attics. And then some.

And now to ring the changes from one year to the next, here’s…um, some old shit from “All The Way From Over There” series three newly stuck together with none of those rubbish bits the others wrote. Which includes a visit to meet Mr Bean, Trent Darby T’errence welcomes the famous, pop bastards The Vas Deferens sing a few charming ditties, the story of mash marketing supremo Sir Alan Potato, Doctor Who finally loses it, Wigwam talks to Tony Blair and loads of other tut about Life On Mars, Kombat Opera and various other super vaguery and flights of fancy.

All The Way From Over There - The Best Of Series Three [28’50, 80kb]

Its Listmas! DAY THREE

And so we reach the inevitable singles of the year, but before that I should probably let you have the mp3 first. We could be a while…

THE BEN BAKER DIRTY VIDEO CASSETTE

Series Two, Episode Four - “About Peak Time” [10′57, 80kb] Part one of a two part special episode in which Terry Thoughtful teaches Ben Baker the true meaning of adult literacy and they both learn an important lesson about spastics. Mostly not calling them that.

Now onto the singles. The first half of a top 20, to be precise. Now I’ve done these aimless charts over a decade now and it looked for a while as if this years wouldnt happen, with the download ‘revolution’ and less and less actual CD releases. Then I thought “fuck it” as I dont think I actually bought any of these on record anyway.

So this is a proper singles chart [although one was a rare 7” only available in North America but other than that…], I decided to judge something as a single if it had a music video. And a proper one with some sort of budget too, not just an MS Paint representation of a Wierd All Yankchovickt album track. Oh, and if you click any of the names, you’ll be whizzed via the power of YouTube to said video to try for yourself and ultimately call me fucking mental. Its ok, I’m used to it.

Shall we…?

11. Paul McCartney - “Only Mama Knows” 
12. Tunng - “Bullets”
13. Kaiser Chiefs - “The Angry Mob”
14. El Perro Del Mar - “God Knows (You Gotta Give To Get)”
15. Klaxons - “Gravity’s Rainbow”
16. The Cribs - “Men’s Needs”
17. Bruce Springsteen - “Radio Nowhere”
18. The Hold Steady - “Massive Nights”
19. Mumm-Ra - “What Would Steve Do?”
20. Sugababes - “About You Now”

Now, unlike the past few days I’m not going to defend these all in the Facebook notes but will happily answer your ”WHY?!?!” to any of them in said comments box. No’s 1-10 tomorrow and dont forget the BIG NEWS happening here on Christmas Eve.

And no, I promise you I’m not becoming a woman…ish.

Its Listmas! DAY TWO

And so Listmas finally gets to day two after a short internet related nightmare. Today’s list is telly related and barring any last minute “oh yeah!” ‘forget-me-box’, its my top 10 favourite programmes of the year. Debate and discussion as ever on the notes section of my Facebook profile.

1. The Peter Serafinowicz Show (BBC Two)
2. Charlie Brooker’s Screen Wipe (BBC Four)
3. Newstopia (SBS)
4. A Bucket Of French And Saunders (BBC One)
5. Doctor Who (BBC One)
6. Harry Hill’s TV Burp (ITV1)
7. 30 Rock (NBC)
8. Reaper (Fox)
9. Pushing Daisies (ABC)
10. Dexter (Showtime)

And now to uphold my end of the bargain, you’ve read my list and now here’s some more mp3 fun, in this case you’ll be pleased to know, is little to nothing to do with me bar a bit of mixing. Its my “Christmas Champagne Comedy Mix” that very few people heard last year featuring many of your proper radio comedy favourites from Victor Lewis Smith to Frank Sidebottom. Enjoy.

Christmas Champagne Comedy Mix [2007 Edit] [31’41, 160kb]

Net. Net. Not.

Just a note to say that there will be more lists and audio rubbish (including two ready to go new radio shows) soon here at the Tumblr, but I’m presently having a nightmare due to being a Virgin Media customer and as a result have spent most of this week offline or limited to about 1kb upload. But I’ll persevere and you will get your promised crap as you (three) demand.

For was it not Oscar Wilde who said “Ee, Terrence pass us a birra that bum over ‘ere, Ah be raht fancying a bit. Reet up. The lot. Unnngghhhhh…”?

No, no it was not. Goodnight.

Its Listmas! DAY ONE

And so the list ‘n’ links ferrago rolls to a pitiful start as I present one of the (If I’m being entirely honest, still not properly finished) lists of the year for you, my great British public. Or at the very least, my average British phone box. Still, BenFans will no doubt enjoy the mp3 stuck at the end of it, but what could it be???? (Its a new edit of last years Christmas special) See? It could be ANYTHING!

So here’s, barring any late storming arrivals are my ten albums of the year (commentary available on Facebook comments later, Im in a bit of a rush y’see…)

1. Super Furry Animals - “Hey Venus!”
2. Underworld - “Oblivion With Bells”
3. The Go! Team - “Proof Of Youth”
4. They Might Be Giants - “The Else”
5. Radiohead - “In Rainbows”
6. Paul McCartney - “Memory Almost Full”
7. The Depreciation Guild - “In Her Gentle Jaws” 
8. Kate Nash - “Made Of Bricks”
9. Griff Rhys - “Candylion”
10. Modest Mouse - “We Were Dead Before The Ship Sank”

Obvious as all hell, I’m sure you’ll agree. And now as your reward, pleasee accept this download of last years “All The Way From Over There” christmas special cleaned up and made a bit funnier. Oh, all the characters died at the end of the series before. You should probably know that…

Bring Back…All The Way From Over There (14’35, 80kb)