Its The...Ben Fan Happiness Bang!

Putting the 'List' Into Christmas. And An L.

So, the Tumblr’s been a bit sleepy the past few weeks and I apologise but I’ve had a Big Top Secret Project to sort out which I’ll be reveal here on the blog on CHRISTMAS EVE. So, keep a beak out for that. And in the run up to that, I thought I’d do something a bit different for your entertainment and mine.

Y’see, its that time of year where every dog and its sister publishes their personal “best of the year” charts and while it might make them feel sexy and special, its not always the most gripping for their readers who probably just want to bugger off and publish their own lists instead.

So, here’s the deal. You get to ogle one of my personal lists from tomorrow, for the next seven days and as special treat, you’ll be rewarded with an mp3 at the end of each one. There’s new radio things planned, new compilations, christmas specials and the usual sort of tat I end up throwing at you poor suckers who still feel some sort misplaced patronising of this here weblog.

And thats Christmas. And hey, who knows? You could even have as much fun as this guy here…

(The sad thing is that I still find it so funny, Phil…)

Obviousness, Thy Name Be...

A quick note for users of Virgin digital TV services who have the XL package, all the music videos they’re almost embarassingly over-advertising every time you enter any of the menus, are now free. And whats the first one out of the many hundreds available they have that I’ve chosen to look at?

“The Only Living Boy In New Cross” by Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine.

There really is no hope for me. Mind you, there was a tough competition from Five’s “Keep On Movin’”, I can tell you… #Ohhhh, get on up, when you’re down, baby, take a gooood loook arounnnndddd……..

Talk About The Late Fees

Episode Six - Talk About…The Christmas Singles [29′51, 80kb]

Its the most wonderful time of the year… However, back in October when we recorded this it most definately wasnt. So join Darrell Jones as he is repeatedly sniggered at due to his now timely choice of christmas singles. The Greater Manchester Police Force insists..

NB: This is another very giggly edition and one of only two done in person (the other being Ian’s a few editions back). A chance to redeem ourselves after the slightly inaudible Doctor Who pre-pilot we did back in June (which still remains the most downloaded show to date. By like, a hundred. You bastards.) And yes that Coronation Street album really does exist…

Play Your Cards Trite

I’m hopefully buying my Christmas cards today and whilst they’ll be fairly standard and ordinary ones, I’d be happy to send you one (chock full of exclusive to you scribbling and doodles) if we are excellent sexy friends.

So, if you’d like to be on the sending list, please send an email with your address and the most rubbish reason you can think of why you deserve a ‘BenCard’ in no more than 10 words to - taxiforbaker@hotmail.com OR bother me on my Facebook account. But dont do it on MSN as I’m almost usually not there. Or interested in talking to you.

I am of course am happy to recieve cards from yourselves, because I am depressed type and in a state of constant requirement of fulfillment and perpetual self-confirmation. Also: a child. My address is visible to some via my Facebook page, others will have to work for it. And oh, I mean work…

Merry christmas to ME…

Talk About Yoko Ono. No Really..

Episode Five - Talk About…Yoko Ono [28′55, 80kb]

Some passions are universal - things that everyone loves, respects and admires. While others, like this week’s programme, are more likely to just result in a universal cry of “WHAT?!?”. And that’s exactly what Mike Scott wants you to think as he discusses his appreciation of one of the world’s most hated figures, Yoko Ono. Why? There’s only one way to find out…

NB: Recorded immediately after Alison’s TATP about The Late Show. See if you can spot the moment in the recording where my mobile phone goes off (with a very familiar Dead Air Society sound…) in the background, fun fans!

Alarming Times

I hate alarms, me.

The more regular Benfans to this Tumblr may remember this post from about 6 weeks ago in which I described my heartstopping terror at the hands of a new alarm service at my housemate Wiggers’ (twice recently burgled) work that rings out members of staff when the alarm itself has been set off. You may note from said post that last time it turned out to be quite literally ‘a false alarm’, with his boss forgetting to turn it off in time.

Last night, we were not so lucky. The same pattern happened - phone went off, it was the alarm message, Wiggers rang his boss to check and…nothing. No answer. He tried again. The same. I was oblivious to this at the time as I was having a well-deserved shite. Through the door, he asked if I fancied a walk.

And thus at 11:45pm on a piss-wet Wednesday night, this is how I was spending my time:

Anyone round here ever played “F.E.A.R”?

Captain Wiggers leads his infantry to who knows what battle…

The shop in question. What would we find behind its darkened rooms?

Nope, surprisingly enough that doesnt help…

ARRRGH. IT IS THEM MOST TERRIFYING FEARS OF ALL!

So, in summary then, it was another false alarm with no idea what had set it off. And so we had all the pleasure of traipsing back in the same rain, sweating, damp and cold at midnight. All because of a sodding computerised alarm…

I hate alarms, me.